Thursday, January 29, 2015

Avoiding Conflict During Your Divorce

The entire process of divorce is unpredictable. For many, divorce can feel like death. This is especially true for women who tend to process loss in a completely different manner then men. Women are filled with grief and a feeling of guilt. They feel as if they should have seen this coming and should have been able to fix it before it fell apart. As a divorce attorney one of the first things that we set out to do is to help women accept that their marriage is over and that there is nothing that they could have done to change the outcome.

Women must come to terms that they are simply not meant to be together any longer because they no longer bring happiness to one another. We also help them to understand it is possible to be decent to one another while proceeding through the divorce process. Below you will find some tips to help you, as a women/mother going through a divorce.

It is important to tread lightly and take each step of the divorce process as it comes along. Take time to finalize one relationship before getting involved in another. Your focus should be on transitioning your family unit into two pieces. No matter how cordial you are your ex are the process of divorce is challenging and confusing for all vested parties.

Time should be shared equally while reaching a custody agreement. If you choose not to spend time with your children they will resent you. If you take them away from their father and never allow them time to visit they will resent you. It is important to balance time with your children between the two of you. This will be difficult and may take time to understand but trust that it is beneficial for the unit on whole to keep a united front where your children are concerned.

When it comes to communicating, especially when children are involved, talk face to face, and never place your children in the middle. Talking face to face to one another makes it more difficult to slander one another. It is easy to text negativity to your ex but much more difficult to look someone you once loved in the eye and spew negative comments.

Going through a divorce is never easy. It is important that you seek counsel from a local divorce attorney as soon as you realize reconciliation is not going to occur. A divorce attorney will help guide you through the steps of the divorce process and will lead you to healthy support avenues along the way.

Longton DM, a subsidiary of Longton Law Offices is a divorce attorney specializing in Women/Mom's in divorce throughout Trenton and the surrounding Michigan areas. Find us at

Processing Your Divorce WIth Help From A Divorce Attorney

The ending of your marriage is never easy.  Here are a few tips for men, fathers going through the divorce process to help.

Stop Feeling Sorry For Yourself

It is never easy to go through a traumatic experience and pull yourself out of it but that is the best thing you can do as a man going through a divorce.  Stop feeling sorry for yourself, get over your own personal pity party and start living your new life.  You are not the only one who is going through a divorce and you will survive.  If you are sure your marriage is over, the papers have been served and signed, it is time to resign yourself to the fact your marriage is over.  It is time to move on.  Grieve for a bit but don’t allow yourself to be sucked into thriving off of pity.  Seek professional services for your divorce.  Counseling is not only something available for women in divorce but is also available for men, fathers going through a divorce as well.

Find A Divorce Attorney

Find legal representation as soon as soon as you realize that you are in fact in the midst of a divorce or separation.  A divorce attorney, especially one that specializes in men going through the divorce process will represent your best interest.  What happens frequently in divorce is that the male figure seeks to claim responsibility for a ruined marriage.  Men are fixers and when they are unable to fix their marriage the next best thing for them is to accept responsibility, so they believe.

Get Your Finances In Order

This is far from the truth and can leave many men in financial ruin.  If a divorce is occurring it is because two people failed to be able to create a life together.  No one person is at fault and therefore no one person should take that entire responsibility on themselves.  Don’t end your marriage and believe you are destined to live in financial ruin.  That is not the case.  This is just one of the many reasons men should seek the advice of a professional divorce attorney as soon as they are certain the marriage is coming to an end.

Be There For Your Children

Never stop being a part of your children’s lives and don’t move out of your family home until you have met with a divorce attorney.  Getting a divorce is hard on all parties involved and should be done with a conscience effort to each decision that is made.  Consider your welfare as well as that of your children. Going through a divorce is a step by step process in which a professional divorce attorney for men will advise you in each step along the way.

Longton DM, a subsidiary of Longton Law Offices is a divorce attorney specializing in Men/Dad’s in divorce.  For experienced representation throughout the divorce process in Trenton, Michigan and the surrounding area you can find more information at