Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Emotions Throughout The Divorce Process

There are so many emotions that are experienced throughout the divorce process.  It is hard to go through the process without feeling a little bit of everything.  The hope is that it won’t all hit at one time and that having a better understanding of what you will be experiencing it won’t be as difficult of a process to navigate. 
One of the first emotions when going through a divorce is intense anger.  It may be that you are trying to convey a mixture of pain, anxiety or irritation that comes out as anger.  This feeling of intense wrath is a mechanism we use to shield ourselves.  We try to protect ourselves from the vulnerability we are feeling and this is often done using anger.  Projecting anger leave us in a state that doesn’t allow us to be discarded once again. 
Another emotion that participants in a divorce succumb to is shock.  You may be caught completely off guard when you are served with divorce papers.  People have been known to be caught off guard; unaware that the troubles in their marriage have led to a request for a divorce.  That feeling, the one in which it feels as if someone punched you as hard as they could right in the gut.  Your life is going to change, it will be scary and it starts right now. 
Another emotion that is often felt is the feeling of rejection and despair.  Despair comes from being rejected.  The feeling of someone not accepting you brings back feelings in your life of when you have previously been disregarded.  Often times when your marriage fails people feel as if they too have failed.  You are not damaged goods just because your marriage did not work.  Your dreams have not failed; all that has happened is that you need to trade in the old dreams for new ones. 
The fear of being alone is something that comes along with divorce.  This is especially true if you have been in a relationship for an extended period of time.  If you are unfamiliar with spending time by yourself the feeling can be quiet scary and cause you to have an overwhelming level of fear.  Trust yourself, it is possible to survive on your own without the help of your partner. 
When any change occurs and a new phase of life is about to get underway it can be pretty scary.  It is alright to be scared.  Being scared is natural.  It would be unrealistic to believe that this phase would pass without it. 
You will feel quiet bitter towards your partner and others that may be helping them through the process. Seeing your perfect family being ripped apart, thrown into turmoil because your spouse filed for divorce will cause you to be overcome with bitterness.  When your partner files you will blame them; you will blame them for an outcome that you feel you don’t deserve.
Allow yourself to go through the myriad of emotions you are sure to feel.  There is no right way to process your divorce.  A good divorce attorney will offer you referrals for assistance in handling your emotions throughout the entire divorce process.  Your divorce attorney will guide you; they are familiar with a process you are not so trust them and their instincts.  Hold on tight for the rollercoaster ride you are about to embark upon!
Longton DM, a subsidiary of Longton Law Offices is a divorce attorney specializing in Women/Mom's in divorce throughout Trenton and the surrounding Michigan areas. Find us at http://www.michigandivorcelawyerforwomen.com.

When Is Divorce The Only Option Left

Divorce is not an easy way out of a marriage that is unsatisfying.  Many people consider divorce as a last resort and try incredibly hard to make their way through the difficult times in their marriages.  Vows are taken seriously and people fight to make relationships work. That is why when a divorce occurs it is not taken lightly as it is not an easy wait out of something that you worked so hard to revive.  In fact the divorce process is anything but simple but sometimes it is the only way out of a difficult situation that cannot be fixed. 
If you have considered every other option and have found that a divorce is inevitable consider the following article.  It will help you better understand a variety of scenarios in which a divorce is for sure a better option for both you and your spouse.
  • A divorce is probable when you have really taken every other step to make your relationship work.  There are times when your marriage will have a bunch of rough patches but with a little work and understanding they can be repaired.  If you have been to marriage counseling and have put in an honest effort into fixing the issues in your relationship than divorce may be all that is left.  Divorce might be the only option left to ensure that you and your spouse don’t spend the rest of your lives making one another miserable. 
  • When two people have grown apart and have completely changed there may be no way to create what you had to begin with.  If the person you married long ago is not the person you are married to now a divorce is often in your cards. When your goals, interests and future dreams no longer align it may be time to look into divorce as your next step.  When the gap between who you were and who you are now cannot be gapped it is time to call it quits.
  • If you can’t stand one another and are avoiding all contact with each other it is time to consider options in ending your marriage.   If you can’t talk with each other without it turning into an argument you can be assured you have problems in your marriage that cannot be fixed.  Your situation would be better off ending in divorce. 
  • When you start to see your marriage or lack thereof affecting your children it is time to consider separating.  Believe it or not even with the difficulties that divorce causes children staying in an unhappy relationship that is visual to your children is worse.  Your children will be happier when they see that the two people that love them most in the world are happy as well.
When you have hit the wall and divorce is the option that your marriage is heading in contact a divorce attorney.  Talking with an attorney that specializes in divorce and family law will allow you to get an upper hand with your life after divorce.  
Longton DM, a subsidiary of Longton Law Offices is a divorce attorney specializing in Men/Dad’s in divorce.  For experienced representation throughout the divorce process in Trenton, Michigan and the surrounding area you can find more information at http://www.michigandivorcelawyerfordad.com.