Wouldn’t life be wonderful if we could give ourselves advice on experiences before we experienced them? Divorce is a hindsight 20/20 situation. Divorce is one of those situations where we need advice before we go through it but often don’t know where to turn. Other women who have gone though divorce come in to play to help us. Below are the top ten pieces of advice women give each other when moving through the divorce process.
It can take some time to recover
Just because the divorce process has started or finalized does not mean that there is an automatic switch that will allow you to recover. Recovering from a divorce is difficult. You won’t necessarily be able to bounce back and go about your life as it was. Take time to recover. You need time to process and heal. You may feel like you can barely function and that too is okay. Be ready however because there will come a time when you will be ready to move on and to let yourself heal.
When looking for council don’t settle on an attorney; it is important that you find an attorney that specializes in family law and divorce. A lawyer that specializes in something other than divorce and family law will not get you the results you want out of your divorce. A divorce attorney understands all the ins and outs of local law and state nuances.
Analyze your finances
Get as much information as you can about the family finances. You not only have to have a handle on your own finances but also a grip on all of the accounts within the household. You should know what payments are coming out automatically, where funds are invested, what bills need to be paid and more. If possible gather online usernames and passwords so that you are able to look up information as needed.
Consider the future of your living expenses
If you are going to be living on your own it is important that consider the money that you have coming in to decide what you can afford to have outgoing every month. If you don’t know exactly what you will need you won’t know what to ask for and then may end up sacrificing your own financial needs.
Stop thinking of divorce as failure
Don’t beat yourself up. Divorce is not about failing or being rejected all it means is that your relationship did not work out. The sooner you understand that you are not at fault the sooner you will be able to get on with moving on with your life.